Yesterday, we said focus was crucial.
But focus on what? If we are redeemed and renewed, then it’s our values.
Values
Apart from my salvation, the most important thing that happened to me was to develop a particular understanding of James 4:1-2.
1 What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? 2 You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. (ESV emphasis added)
This passage is rightly understood as pertaining to at least two people fighting because they each value something that is at odds with what the other one values. Their “passions are at war within them.”
But when it says “within them,” it allows me to imagine that the war is happening inside of me, even if there is no opponent I want to murder.
Wow…think about that. Your own desires are at war inside you, warring with each other.
What kind of turmoil is that causing? I think it’s a lot.
It’s tempting to think desire is the problem. But desiring would be perfectly natural, even if we didn’t have sin in our flesh.
So bear with me and assume that desire is okay. What goes wrong, then?
What if your desires are waging war because they are out of order?
Think about the things you desire. Think about the things you value. When two values are at odds, they are probably out of order. All humans have a hierarchy of values, and if lower values are insubordinate, it will cause issues.
For instance: You value your marriage, golf, work, and God.
What order should those be in? Nothing wrong with having golf as a value. (Not me. I’m not paying money to get mad.) But if you put it above God, work, or your marriage, you will have a trainwreck of a life.
It should be:
God
Marriage
Work
A bunch of other stuff
Golf
You could make a case that work is even a higher priority than marriage since it is lower at the base of a hierarchy of needs. Can’t support a marriage if you have no food. Spiritually, however, I’d still put my marriage above my work.
Today, if you are willing to do this with me, list all the things you think you value. Beware, though; the other thing that can mess us up is to treat as values things we don’t truly value. Why would we do that? Social pressure is the most common reason. So be careful. Pray, ask God to help you search your heart, and start writing all your values. These are not the things you think you should want. These are the things you actually want. Here are some of mine, in no particular order.
Right relationship with Jesus
Good marriage
Loving and respectful relationship with my kids
Work I don’t hate that pays the bills
Work I love that might someday pay the bills
Eating healthy
Exercising
Being part of a good church
Studying the Bible
Reading good books
Thinking about theology and philosophy in a way that helps me live life better
Honesty
Going on walks
Helping fathers in my community
Church planting
Healthy relationships with my parents and siblings
Being useful to my community
Writing
Teaching writing
Preaching
Tasty food
Capitalism
Generosity
Justice
Mercy
Archery
Fishing
Pick up trucks
Bulldogs
Football
Music
Singing
Gardening
Managing my finances responsibly
Extended family
Knowing a lot of people
Being super close with a few people
Small group Bible studies
Beautiful architecture
Greatness of any kind
Good movies and TV shows
Skiing
Body surfing in the ocean
I’m sure I could come up with a hundred more. How about you? Tomorrow we’ll talk more about the different value domains. I have a friend, Tal Tsafany, who, though not a Christian, has done some incredible work in this area with his Happiness Teams.
I pray that you will have a value-oriented day today. Just thinking about what you value will cause you to make the wisest use of your time. On that note,
15 Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise,16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. (Eph 5:15-16 ESV)
‘Health’ usually gets moved higher up the list when it shouts loudest :-)
And don;t they say that golf is a good walk spoilt?
This past year, I have lost several family members. Circumstances have caused me to look closely at my values. The peace that passes understanding is the greatest gift I have been given, and thus today, the one I value most. Praise be to Jesus.